Eldorado Nugget

I finally left the cavern with the beautiful and peaceful pool. It would have been so easy to stay within the comfort of that cavern and forget my purpose except for the fact that my dreams at night were becoming more desperate.

I saw images of someone (probably me) wandering lost through long dark passages. Images of someone (probably me again) holding their head as if it would explode at any moment. These were images I couldn’t ignore for long because during my waking hours, whenever I looked into the pool, I would see them there too.

I was being told something and there was no mystery to its meaning. I needed to move on through the mine, complete the journey and come out the other end a more rounded character. My thoughts turned to Oliver and Beatrix often during this time and I was suddenly suspicious of the dreams and images in the pool. I thought I was safe from their eyes whilst in the cavern but apparently not. But they always seemed to have my best interests at heart and they had never wanted me to sell myself short. So I had to keep moving on.

I kept walking and suddenly my dreams were coming true before my eyes. The passageways and tunnels were very dark but there were parts of the walls that glowed and pulsed like a heartbeat when I touched them. I did not remember this from the dreams but whoever said that dreams were the truth? Surprisingly, the pulsing reassured me even though at first I was scared. I had thoughts of the mine being alive and any minute now it would close its walls and squeeze the life out of me. But the rhythm of the pulse was soothing and the walls gave me warmth when I touched the lightest parts. Maybe the mine wasn’t the obstacle course I had always imagined. Maybe it was on my side. Maybe it was supposed to help me on my journey.

Eventually, I reached an intersection and in the middle of it, there stood an altar. The air was fresher here as well and it reminded me of being by the pool. On the altar rested a large book as thick as my thigh and probably as heavy as a door. As I moved closer the pages of the book seemed to reflect light from somewhere. I looked up and saw that there was a circular opening in the ceiling of the mine and I could see the sky above. It was night outside and the moon seemed to be directly overhead keeping the stars company in the sky.

I looked back down to the book and gasped as I realised that the pages were made of thin mirrors mounted on thick paper, somehow bound intricately together to form a Book of Mirrors. I kept turning pages and they all seemed to be mirrors. No writing, no artwork, nothing but mirrors. I didn’t understand it and I leaned forward to look at myself maybe hoping to see someone or something else. I saw almost what I expected. Dirty skin, a mop of curly, messy hair on my head, eyes that looked tired and a mouth that looked hungry and thirsty. My brow was furrowed in confusion. And then words appeared on the mirror I was looking into.

WHERE IS MY ELDORADO?

I was even more confused now. I had some notion of what Eldorado meant but where was who’s Eldorado? Mine? Someone else’s? The book’s?

Not being able to think of anything else to do and having used this method before, I closed my eyes and relaxed, seeking the answer within. I have no idea how long I stood there meditating but when I opened my eyes, I felt less tired and my head was clearer. As I looked into the mirror again, the words were still there and I read them aloud this time.

“Where is my Eldorado?”

This is answer that came to me:

Eldorado

A place, a time, a person, a thing?

Any and all

Searching forever and never finding

Looking in the wrong place

Not asking and listening

Not being quiet and still

Be quiet and still

Ask and listen

It is often inside yourself

What you desire and seek

From the outside

But outside things do not change

Unless you change within

My Eldorado is sleeping

Deep in my soul

It is where the real me lies

Waiting for when I have the courage

To give up the fake me

And be true to myself

When I can look in the mirror and not feel guilt

And anger

And resentment

And sorrow

But peace

And calm

And hope

And love

Where is my Eldorado?

Within myself

by Soultide

Stalling at the Pool

It has been so lovely here

And I could stay forever

But I must move on

No matter how much fear grips me

There is a whole mine to explore

Full of treasures yearning to be revealed

But I fear what finding these will reveal about me

I need to move on

No more stalling at the pool

The elixir is waiting

And I must grow some more
by Soultide

Full Moon

Rosary of the holy lamb

Did your hand run across it?

O Saint of fire and light

Did your feet run in the meadow

With speckled dingoes and sheepdogs?

Were the beads dipped in blood?

Did your hand draw back with

The flesh all but gone?

 

Did you say your prayer

Amidst the smoke, sirens and the pain?

Was the moon rising full

Over the trees and outback?

 

The faerie queen danced just outside

My back door last night.

The angels cried when they saw your wounds,

Archangels bringing green/gold flames

 

Bring me my sword, Joan

Bring me my shield and armour

Bring me my spear and all the horses

Of my ancestors.

Under the full moon we will be warriors

If he can’t heal you

I will find the God who can.

MotherBear

 

Kindling…

Kindling The Fire ~This morning

As I kindle the flame upon my hearth,

I pray that the flame of Christ

May burn in my soul.

I pray that no envy or malice,

No hatred or fear,

May smother the flame,

I pray that indifference and apathy,

Contempt and pride, may not pour

Like cold water on the flame.

Instead, may the spark of Christ light

The love in my soul,

And may it burn brightly through the day.

May I warm those that are lonely,

whose hearts are cold and lifeless

So that all may know the comfort of

Christ’s love.

Mother Bear

dream seeds

Where does one come by dream seeds?

how does one know the way

to enter into mists of magick?

letting chambers locked and closed for years

creak…creak… sloowwwwly opening the door…

Enchanteuer my dear, come hither

Is it you have called me here?  May I have my packet of seeds?

May I try my wings? That shall be a sight to see -

 a flying bear.

MotherBear

find a feather

Find a feather from a silver hawk this week and press it in your prayer book. Send your prayers up to heaven on its soft small fluffiness.

Alluvial Mine - Real Gold

We left the mules tethered at the entrance of the mine, and let Max do all the talking. The minekeeper dressed in red nodded her head and gave us no trouble as we passed, concealing the skull behind her back. She brushed away some cobwebs that had gathered, hanging like old garments from the damp cave walls. Max chirped and chattered, his small eyes glowing red in the semi darkness, and he had an intense look on his face. The grey ghost was nowhere in sight. The rock glowed in places, clinging with bright jade moss and shimmering ore. Our footfalls echoed in the space, and we could hear water running, cool and clear, inside the honeycomb caverns. “It’s better than I thought,” said Orlando, and I nodded, knowing he did not always believe things until he saw them. “It’s because of Max…he knows far more than we do, and everything more than the other ‘advisors’. I think they were illusions. Delusions. Maude did mention them…” He nodded, distracted by a kind of room formed by old water routes, that once roared through the honeycomb. Max was animated, leaning forward like an arrow, his little glowing eyes beaming in a new direction. A thin shaft of sunlight streamed in from a gap in the rock of the underground space, illuminating a kind of font, and we looked at the reflection in it. “What is it?” I said. “What is it indeed?” I said, as we both suddenly realised its meaning and stared.

(copyright Imogen Crest 2006.)

Mine Canary

In the olden days, miners who went deep into coal shafts used to carry a golden canary with them into the chambers below. The miners, usually people who had spent their entire lives in the depths of mining shafts, were unable to sense when toxic gasses were escaping from the walls. The rule was simple, if you looked over and saw that the canary was laying on its side with “Xs” for eyes, you knew it was time to run as fast as you could towards an elevator.

Be sure to keep an eye on the canary as you mine the alluvial mine. Make sure to listen to the voice of the canary - which is quite different to that of the inner critic.