Pirate Women Need Only Respond

Just hanging out…and and looking to have some fun

You know…

FUN.

As in not taking every little thing in life seriously.

Except for things like

Alien Boy

and

those guys from CSI

and Pirate Songs.

Of which the world needs more of.

So if you can’t sing, guzzle Margaritas and duct tape skinny Scotsman to trees with a hangover in your left eye…um…sing, guzzle Margaritas and borrow some tape from Lori or Jane, Heaven knows they’ve got plenty because Cle is always stealing MINE and giving it to THEM.

Ha.

Like I couldn’t figure it out.

So cheers, and if anyone knows where the floor is, be so kind as to point me in the right direction.

Thank You.

A.M.

“The Pirates That Don’t Do Anything”

we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

well I’ve never been to Greenland
and I’ve never been to Denver
and I’ve never buried treasure in ST Louie or ST Paul
and I’ve never been to Moscow
and I’ve never been to Tampa
and I’ve never been to Boston in the fall

we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

and I’ve never hoist the main sail
and I’ve never swabbed the poop deck
and I’ve never veered starboard, cause I’ve never sailed at all
and I’ve never walked the gang plank
and I’ve never owned a parrot.
and I’ve never been to Boston in the fall

we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

I’ve never plucked a rooster
and I am not too good at ping-pong
and I’ve never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall
and I’ve never kissed a chipmunk,
and I’ve never gotten head lice
and I have never been to Boston in the fall

(pirate captains log 2002
who be this band relient k
and why they be so full of contradictions)

we don’t know what he did
but we’re down with captain kidd
we don’t wake up before lunch
but we all eat captain crunch
we don’t smoke, we don’t chew
we watch captain kangaroo

and I’ve never licked a spark-plug
and I’ve never sniffed a stink bug
and I’ve never painted Daisies on a big red rubber ball
and I’ve never bathed in yogurt
and I don’t look good in leggings
and I’ve never been to Boston in the fall

we are the pirates who don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything